The secret inside Whole30

Being at the middle point of my 30 days, I was re-reading a few things in the book and something donned on me. Whenever I mention to people what I'm doing, the reaction is the same: "But I love bread and sugar!" Love? Really?

It occurred to me that this would be the reaction a drunk would have if a friend was giving up drinking and said they could too. Can't you hear it? "But I love drinking!" OR as a close friend of mine likes to say, "If I wasn't an alcoholic I'd be drunk all the time."

Knowing and admitting you have a problem is the first step to recovery. And that's true no matter what the addiction. Ask yourself this: SHOULD you need bread and sugar? Should you actually feel sad about not getting to eat a food? Should you utter the world love about food?

Foods purpose is to properly harness the energy of the sun and make it something that our bodies can digest in order to sustain us. Nowhere in that sentence does it say that we should feel emotionally satisfied by food. Like an alcoholic relies on liquor to bring them comfort, a sugar-holic relies on sugar and bread to bring them comfort. Don't believe me? Then stop having them. See how you feel.

My guess is you're now going to come up with justifications. "But I can stop whenever I want" "But I have control over it because I only have it in moderation" "It's not effecting my life negatively, not like an alcoholic." Sound familiar? I have several friends in recovery and my guess is the first time someone suggested that they quit drinking or getting high they had something similar to say.

In my article in Examiner.com I touch on the medical reasons for giving up sugar. Mainly heart disease. Heart disease is the number one killer of men and women in the United States. And what is a proven cause of heart disease? You guessed it: sugar.

"But what about holidays and birthdays and office parties and happy hour and romantic evenings with my partner??"

Believe me I get it and I'm not saying never. You're a grown up, that's going to be up to you. For me, in my life, it's almost never. I don't live in a strict world. I'm a grown up too and if I want to go to happy hour, I'm going to strategically plan for happy hour (after my 30 days, of course). If somebody's birthday is coming up and I know we're going somewhere awesome I'm going to prepare for that and I will make an educated choice as to what I want to eat or drink. The important part in this is knowledge. It's impossible to control an addiction you aren't aware you have.

I'm simply asking this: Are you addicted to sugar? No? Prove it.

Once you realize that yes, you are; try out any of the sugar detox diets out there. Whole30 has worked for me, but there are others. Once you're off sugar and can think clearly, you will likely discover that you no longer feel the need to "love" a food. Instead, when you eat, you'll love the way you actually feel. Physically. Not emotionally.

Seeing sugar as poison

Warning: this gets a little long

Having moved since my last post from NYC to sunny California, my life has been a little crazy. My weight has remained stable through this transition and I stopped worrying about losing for a while so that I could settle into life here. I'm now on a simple routine of walking to and from work each day (1.3 miles each way) and then yoga/stretching twice a week. I will soon be adding weight training in 2-3 days per week as well.

Now about sugar.

I spent last weekend in beautiful Lake Tahoe with my oldest friend in the world. She's a scientist and specializes in how various chemicals effect cell structure, etc. I am lost very easily when she speaks, but she is a great teacher and brings it back down to my level as soon as my face goes "huh?"

The topic this weekend was about a study that was recently completed. She is super critical of studies and doesn't believe most of what is out there. She will pour over the details of findings to make sure each step was done properly and that there was no possibility of bias on behalf of the researchers. It is this intense distrust in her that makes me worried. This new study she believes. She said the findings tell us this:

Sugar changes our DNA.
Sugar causes cancer.
Sugar then feeds the cancer.
Sugar causes diabetes.
Sugar causes heart disease.*

Sugar causes our cells to continue dividing even when they are unhealthy/damaged cells. In a normal body, when a cell divides and the result is a damaged cell, the cell itself has within it's structure to commit suicide; thus ensuring that only healthy cells continue dividing. Sugar blocks that signal. This means that when a cell divides and results in a damaged cell, that damaged cell goes right on dividing. It isn't hard to see why we as a nation have gotten so unhealthy so fast.

Thanks to the "fat makes you fat" craze, anything and everything was created "fat-free" AKA: high sugar. The flavor had to come from somewhere. Research has now proven that we were wrong. Completely. Some fats make you fat, but it is sugar that makes you sick. It's toxic. And it's in everything.

Alright, so not EVERYTHING. What isn't it in? The perimeter of the store. We've all heard it...that you're supposed to walk into the supermarket and stay on the outside. Why? Everything inside is processed. That truth is much more important than we knew.

The FDA is now in the process of changing food labels to show us the added sugar. The study is changing the face of food...and hopefully, your kitchen cupboards.

But HOW?!? Sugar?!? 

I know. Believe me, I know. Even after I had broken myself (through a ton of prayer) of my addiction to it, I was still in love with it. Come on, it's sugar!

That's the problem. When given the choice between sugar and cocaine (yes, cocaine), mice chose sugar! It's so addictive it can even make you want it over cocaine if you have to choose between them. If you don't think you're addicted to it, then stop. Today. See how that goes.

When you realize that you, yes you, are addicted...only then can you begin to heal it and stop having it entirely. The FDA is currently saying it's safe to have up to 5 teaspoons a day for women/7 for men. But a couple of years ago, it was 8/10...essentially sugar is being seen a less and less healthy. Therefore, it's my belief that the only solution is to remove it completely...like quitting smoking. Just done.

Does this mean you'll never ever ever have anything with sugar ever again? No.
Does it mean you'll stop buying it and eating it regularly? Yes.

Sugar should become so rare in your life that just as a previous chain smoker will be annoyed by the smell of smoke wafting their way, the taste of it should annoy you. After all, it's bad for you. Your body knows it, you've just been so inundated with it that your body figured out a way to deal with it. Your taste buds changed, your blood sugar changed and everything lined up to allow for this addiction.

It's not as hard as it sounds.

When I decided to take it out of my diet, I started SLOWLY. The word NO never entered my brain. I simply stopped buying anything with sugar in it. I also stopped counting calories. The only way I was going to get through this was to NOT feel hungry. Ever. Hunger = cravings = bad choices. So I surrounded myself with things I like that aren't sugary...crackers, cheeses, fruits, oatmeal, salad, chicken, yogurt, tea, coffee, hummus, salsa...you get the idea. FOOD.

I've always been a "snack" person. Something sweet after dinner is normal for me. So instead of going cold-turkey, I allowed myself to have whatever was left in my kitchen. This included fiber one bars. They're chocolate and oat, so there IS sugar. And eventually they are a no...but while I transition, the fiber allows my blood sugar not to spike and the chocolate allows my brain not to revolt.

And you know what? It's not that hard. In fact, cutting it out is making me less hungry. Go figure. I am beginning to prefer the taste of naturally sweet foods more...oranges, yogurt (unsweetened - unflavored), tomatoes and I physically don't long for it. Hooray!

What to eat then?

I recently joined a CSA, which will deliver fresh, locally grown fruits and veggies to me each week. This means that I don't even have to go to the store to have all the healthy I need! I highly suggest doing things like this for yourself...if it's easy, you'll stick to it.

I looked up the various foods we should be eating each day and here's my list:

• Food Amount Calories
• Hemp Seeds 3 TBSP 135
• Yogurt 3/4 c 110
• Flax Seeds 2 TBSP 74
• Cinnamon 1/2 tsp 0
• Almonds 23 163
• Blueberries 1/2 c 42.5
• Broccoli 1/2 c 15
• Oatmeal 1 1/2 c 360
• Tea 2-5 c 0
• Beans 3/4 c 495.75
• Garlic 1 clove 0
• Olive Oil 1 TBSP 119

They can be combined and enjoyed in various ways. What matters is trying to eat as close to this list each day as possible for great nutrition and a balanced, happy body. Each has a different reason, so if you cannot stomach one of them, look up why they're good for you and find a substitute. Obviously you will eat more than just this...this is only about 1500 calories (and a person NOT trying to lose weight needs more than that).

*I want to take a moment to point out I am NOT a doctor/researcher/specialist and this is strictly what I was told by a friend whom I trust to have done the research. I encourage you to do the same if you're at all concerned that I'm wrong. Though I can't see a single negative come from eliminating this poison from your diet. To my knowledge no one ever died from NOT eating sugar.

Miscalculations

In the world of weight management, there is one factor that can silently sabotage your efforts...bad information. While much of the world is doing a great job of listing their calorie counts on their menus and in nutritional data online, not every restaurant does this yet. When having to do it on your own, it is quite possible that you will miscalculate things you eat.

This week, I did that. And I gained weight because of it. Thanks to My Fitness Pal, I was able to look at which foods I KNEW I got right, which then allowed me to see what I must have counted wrong. This did several things for me:

• It allows me to never eat those foods again, since I clearly can't properly account for them
• It allows me to NOT beat myself up for the weight gain
• and most importantly, it allows me to NOT let this to be a setback 

When you're trying to be healthy and lose weight (or gain it), as with everything in life, there is going to be a learning curve. Some days, weeks, months everything will go the way you think it will. And some won't. That's normal. When you don't know why it happened, it's easy to tell yourself that you failed, that your body is against you, that you might as well just give up because you clearly can't do this.

But when you know why, when you have the right tools and the means of changing your thought life to support you instead of sabotage you, miscalculations can be seen for what they are. Miscalculations. Not an attack, not a failure, not a character flaw. Just a simple, human, miscalculation.

So as I start my Friday, instead of feeling weaker, I actually feel stronger. I know how to do better next week, I know what to avoid and what doesn't support my efforts. I feel empowered.

***Sidenote: You'll notice in my post on what I eat, instead of deleting the things that contributed to this gain, I lined them out so that you too can avoid them :)

Bullies

While walking on the treadmill yesterday, I picked up and read Glamour Magazine. They've always been my favorite and the article I read just reinforced why. They covered the story of a newswoman who last year was bullied by a viewer. He emailed her this:

Hi Jennifer, It's unusual that I see your morning show, but I did so for a very short time today. I was surprised indeed to witness that your physical condition hasn't improved for many years. Surely you don't consider yourself a suitable example for this community's young people, girls in particular. Obesity is one of the worst choices a person can make and one of the most dangerous habits to maintain. I leave you this note hoping that you'll reconsider your responsibility as a local public personality to present and promote a healthy lifestyle.

As someone who has spent my entire adult life obese thanks to health issues, the word that struck me as the most ignorant was the word CHOICE. It made me really ponder the thought life of a person who would choose that word in this situation. Choice. I realized that there is an entire population of people who honestly believe that the way people get fat is by laying around the house eating McDonalds and Haagen Daas.

While I will give you that they do exist, I don't actually know ANYONE who got overweight through laziness and overeating. The laziness and overeating come because of the obesity, not the other way around. The obesity is usually a symptom of an illness...from asthma to pregnancy to hypothyroidism to joint/leg injuries to cancer to weak organs. The weight starts to come on quickly and before you know it you can't move and it basically doesn't matter how much or little you eat, it all just increases your waistline.

While it's easy to assume this man is an idiot or moron, I received an email from a friend of mine from church after my last post thanking me for teaching him so much. He is a learned, intelligent, articulate man in his 40s who is an athlete and he had no idea that there were steroids used medicinally or that they could alter one's body composition. It's unfortunate in today's society that the majority of people actually have no idea what obesity is, how it happens or what it means.

Everyone has their cross to bear; but if you would, take a moment to contemplate if whatever your issues are were out there for the world to see and judge. My asthma made me take meds that increased my weight significantly. I'm finally on my way back to health, but it took decades of trying and failing before I understood what my body needed and could mentally attack the pain in my joints and difficulty breathing in order to actually work out.

The only reason anyone knows I have an issue is because it caused an external symptom called obesity. Those suffering from bi-polar disorder, cancer, depression, IBS, etc generally do so in private. They would not be very happy if the whole world could tell just by looking at them that something was off. And then on top of it, to be blamed for it and told it is "one of the worst choices a person can make and one of the most dangerous habits to maintain."

The next time you see someone you consider obese, instead of thinking "wow, they should put down the donut and hit the gym," a more realistic thought would be, "whatever they're struggling to fight, I pray they get the help they need."

Happy hump day, folks :)

Cheat days

Included in my "plan" are various kinds of cheat days. Once a week I can have 1800 calories and once a month I can have an unlimited day. This weekend I took both, haha. Having a visitor in town...my mom...means we are out and about more than usual. I enjoyed some Italian on Saturday and then Sunday had Chinese for lunch, Mexican for dinner AND some fro-yo with toppings for dessert. Hey, I'm a multi-cultural foodie.

What was awesome was that in neither case did I feel out of control, in neither case did I blow the rest of the day just because of those meals, and in neither case did I wake up feeling hungrier than normal. I decided when I made the "plan" that my big cheat day a month would be followed by a shake day to help re-regulate my blood sugar. I'm halfway through that today and feel great! I'm a little tired, and excited for my salad in an hour or so, but other than that I'm not weird out about it and I'm not trying to talk myself into eating instead.
Progress!

The little voice in your head

I have never so easily been able to distinguish between my soul, my thoughts and the "other" voice in my head as clearly as I do now. My soul is curiously witnessing the exchange and basically not caring what happens ultimately as the body is a temporary residence anyway. But my thoughts are for the first time entirely separate from the voice in my head.

Before you ask, no I'm not schizophrenic, the voice isn't a person. It's the desire. I can hear it telling me just ONE cheat would be okay; just ONE bite; just ONE thing not on the list. Who wants rules anyway? Weren't they made to be broken? Do the doctors really MEAN no, or are they just being overly cautious? I've been good, don't I deserve this? Strict rules aren't healthy, you need this. YOU NEED THIS.

It gets louder.

And yet there above it all are my own thoughts. My very clear, very controlled brain saying NO. For the first time in my life, I think, I'm not trying to find a way to give in, I'm simply saying NO. It's liberating and terrifying and surreal.

The "other" wants me to fail. It wants and wants and wants and is never satiated. It is unwelcome in my life and yet sitting inside my own mind, harassing me to the point that I now need surgery. My epiphany is this:

I always thought I had no will power. That is entirely untrue, I have ridiculously strong will power. And my will WANTS to make the wrong choice. It wants me to fail. It isn't my will power being weak that is the problem, it's been my poor brain finding a way to say no to my will power. What a different world!