Whole30 ideas for a non-Whole30 mind

I get it, I do. You're busy, you're stressed and the last thing in the world you want to do is re-think dinner. Check and check.

So I thought, "Hey! How about just a few changes to get someone started!"

Here's a few:


Buy coconut oil. Use it instead of any other fat you cook with/eat.
Buy cashew butter. Use it instead of peanut butter.
Buy bananas. Let them over-ripen. Cut them up, freeze them in baggies.
Buy coconut milk. Use it instead of all dairy.

When you want a snack, throw bananas in a blender with coconut milk and cashew butter or real fruit juice. YUM!

These require no effort, just a different purchase at the store. Will this fix everything in your life? No. But it WILL get you on the right track and maybe someday you'll be able to add a few more things to this list.

Good luck!!

The secret inside Whole30

Being at the middle point of my 30 days, I was re-reading a few things in the book and something donned on me. Whenever I mention to people what I'm doing, the reaction is the same: "But I love bread and sugar!" Love? Really?

It occurred to me that this would be the reaction a drunk would have if a friend was giving up drinking and said they could too. Can't you hear it? "But I love drinking!" OR as a close friend of mine likes to say, "If I wasn't an alcoholic I'd be drunk all the time."

Knowing and admitting you have a problem is the first step to recovery. And that's true no matter what the addiction. Ask yourself this: SHOULD you need bread and sugar? Should you actually feel sad about not getting to eat a food? Should you utter the world love about food?

Foods purpose is to properly harness the energy of the sun and make it something that our bodies can digest in order to sustain us. Nowhere in that sentence does it say that we should feel emotionally satisfied by food. Like an alcoholic relies on liquor to bring them comfort, a sugar-holic relies on sugar and bread to bring them comfort. Don't believe me? Then stop having them. See how you feel.

My guess is you're now going to come up with justifications. "But I can stop whenever I want" "But I have control over it because I only have it in moderation" "It's not effecting my life negatively, not like an alcoholic." Sound familiar? I have several friends in recovery and my guess is the first time someone suggested that they quit drinking or getting high they had something similar to say.

In my article in Examiner.com I touch on the medical reasons for giving up sugar. Mainly heart disease. Heart disease is the number one killer of men and women in the United States. And what is a proven cause of heart disease? You guessed it: sugar.

"But what about holidays and birthdays and office parties and happy hour and romantic evenings with my partner??"

Believe me I get it and I'm not saying never. You're a grown up, that's going to be up to you. For me, in my life, it's almost never. I don't live in a strict world. I'm a grown up too and if I want to go to happy hour, I'm going to strategically plan for happy hour (after my 30 days, of course). If somebody's birthday is coming up and I know we're going somewhere awesome I'm going to prepare for that and I will make an educated choice as to what I want to eat or drink. The important part in this is knowledge. It's impossible to control an addiction you aren't aware you have.

I'm simply asking this: Are you addicted to sugar? No? Prove it.

Once you realize that yes, you are; try out any of the sugar detox diets out there. Whole30 has worked for me, but there are others. Once you're off sugar and can think clearly, you will likely discover that you no longer feel the need to "love" a food. Instead, when you eat, you'll love the way you actually feel. Physically. Not emotionally.

Whole30 Day 2

Today I awoke tired. I also feel like I'm coming down with something...scratchy throat and ears, tired eyes. I read up and realized I have the "Low Carb Flu" as it's being called. Lethargy and a general feeling of ick are normal for the next couple of days. Oh goody.

Aside from that, all is well. I cooked up a storm last night and have food for quite a while prepared. The newest addition to my life: baked sweet potato with coconut oil and cinnamon. Oh dear jeezus they're good! And so healthy!!!

So what did I make?

Ground Turkey with chives and roasted garlic
Baked chicken with lemon juice and red robin seasoning
Cauliflower Rice
Stir Fried veggies (in the fat and seasonings from the meats)
Baked sweet potatoes

I also used my amazing Cuisinart coffee grinder to prepare my flax seeds and cashews for easier use. I will be adding both to various things to increase my nutrition content.

Any recipes I need to try? Leave them below!!

Whole30 challenge

While speaking with my sister about eliminating sugar from my diet and joining the CSA, she mentioned the Whole30 challenge. She completed it a couple of weeks ago and had amazing results. She and her husband are avid runners and cross-fitters; they are uber healthy, health-conscious and fit; and even still, she dropped a whooping 7 pounds in just 30 days! On top of that, her energy increased, her mood stabilized and she felt so great that she is still at it!

She sent me the book that day and I read it cover to cover fairly quickly. If I had not already begun eliminating so many things from my diet, this would seem a bit more daunting. As it is, however, there are very few additional changes I'd need to make, so figured...why not?!? Starting March 18th (I'm Irish - I'm not going alcohol free on St. Patrick's Day!) I will be on the Whole30 challenge!

It's quite simple - it's like a Paleo diet, but without the neanderthal inspiration. Instead, their idea is this: food either makes you healthier or it doesn't. That's it. So they evaluated everything and came up with the foods that make you healthier. There's no magic potion here, no math is involved and you don't even have to count calories. You simply remove toxic food from your diet...sugar, legumes, preservatives...you get the idea.

People have reported that illnesses have disappeared, health has improved exponentially and overall well-being is transformed. I will let you know how I feel as soon as I begin :)

Joining a CSA

After living in Austin, Texas, the words organic and local became part of my daily vernacular. Farmer's Markets, CSA's and Whole Foods were suddenly in my radar. Farmer's Markets are great, but require one to actually get to them when they're open, which can be rare, and to actually shop, which takes time; and Whole Foods, while largely organic, is rarely local. Enter CSA's.

CSA = Community Supported Agriculture

CSA's are simple:

• Find one near you
• Sign up for the size box you need per week
• Enjoy your produce

Some deliver to communities, some to neighborhoods and others to local merchants. But the gist of it is this...you're getting locally grown, in season fruits and vegetables (organic if that's the CSA you want). You're eating healthier, getting it easier and supporting a local farm. Many of these farms offer tours and different ways of participating, so you can actually SEE what you're eating grow instead of trusting some far off conglomerate to care what you're eating. The people who run the farms are largely the ones doing all of the work...they eat what you eat, so they care as much as you do.

So what do the boxes look like?

The one I joined is called Terra Firma. Last night I enjoyed an amazing potato leek soup made almost entirely from what was sent and today's lunch is a fresh spinach salad courtesy of my box. Just do it! You won't regret it :)

Seeing sugar as poison

Warning: this gets a little long

Having moved since my last post from NYC to sunny California, my life has been a little crazy. My weight has remained stable through this transition and I stopped worrying about losing for a while so that I could settle into life here. I'm now on a simple routine of walking to and from work each day (1.3 miles each way) and then yoga/stretching twice a week. I will soon be adding weight training in 2-3 days per week as well.

Now about sugar.

I spent last weekend in beautiful Lake Tahoe with my oldest friend in the world. She's a scientist and specializes in how various chemicals effect cell structure, etc. I am lost very easily when she speaks, but she is a great teacher and brings it back down to my level as soon as my face goes "huh?"

The topic this weekend was about a study that was recently completed. She is super critical of studies and doesn't believe most of what is out there. She will pour over the details of findings to make sure each step was done properly and that there was no possibility of bias on behalf of the researchers. It is this intense distrust in her that makes me worried. This new study she believes. She said the findings tell us this:

Sugar changes our DNA.
Sugar causes cancer.
Sugar then feeds the cancer.
Sugar causes diabetes.
Sugar causes heart disease.*

Sugar causes our cells to continue dividing even when they are unhealthy/damaged cells. In a normal body, when a cell divides and the result is a damaged cell, the cell itself has within it's structure to commit suicide; thus ensuring that only healthy cells continue dividing. Sugar blocks that signal. This means that when a cell divides and results in a damaged cell, that damaged cell goes right on dividing. It isn't hard to see why we as a nation have gotten so unhealthy so fast.

Thanks to the "fat makes you fat" craze, anything and everything was created "fat-free" AKA: high sugar. The flavor had to come from somewhere. Research has now proven that we were wrong. Completely. Some fats make you fat, but it is sugar that makes you sick. It's toxic. And it's in everything.

Alright, so not EVERYTHING. What isn't it in? The perimeter of the store. We've all heard it...that you're supposed to walk into the supermarket and stay on the outside. Why? Everything inside is processed. That truth is much more important than we knew.

The FDA is now in the process of changing food labels to show us the added sugar. The study is changing the face of food...and hopefully, your kitchen cupboards.

But HOW?!? Sugar?!? 

I know. Believe me, I know. Even after I had broken myself (through a ton of prayer) of my addiction to it, I was still in love with it. Come on, it's sugar!

That's the problem. When given the choice between sugar and cocaine (yes, cocaine), mice chose sugar! It's so addictive it can even make you want it over cocaine if you have to choose between them. If you don't think you're addicted to it, then stop. Today. See how that goes.

When you realize that you, yes you, are addicted...only then can you begin to heal it and stop having it entirely. The FDA is currently saying it's safe to have up to 5 teaspoons a day for women/7 for men. But a couple of years ago, it was 8/10...essentially sugar is being seen a less and less healthy. Therefore, it's my belief that the only solution is to remove it completely...like quitting smoking. Just done.

Does this mean you'll never ever ever have anything with sugar ever again? No.
Does it mean you'll stop buying it and eating it regularly? Yes.

Sugar should become so rare in your life that just as a previous chain smoker will be annoyed by the smell of smoke wafting their way, the taste of it should annoy you. After all, it's bad for you. Your body knows it, you've just been so inundated with it that your body figured out a way to deal with it. Your taste buds changed, your blood sugar changed and everything lined up to allow for this addiction.

It's not as hard as it sounds.

When I decided to take it out of my diet, I started SLOWLY. The word NO never entered my brain. I simply stopped buying anything with sugar in it. I also stopped counting calories. The only way I was going to get through this was to NOT feel hungry. Ever. Hunger = cravings = bad choices. So I surrounded myself with things I like that aren't sugary...crackers, cheeses, fruits, oatmeal, salad, chicken, yogurt, tea, coffee, hummus, salsa...you get the idea. FOOD.

I've always been a "snack" person. Something sweet after dinner is normal for me. So instead of going cold-turkey, I allowed myself to have whatever was left in my kitchen. This included fiber one bars. They're chocolate and oat, so there IS sugar. And eventually they are a no...but while I transition, the fiber allows my blood sugar not to spike and the chocolate allows my brain not to revolt.

And you know what? It's not that hard. In fact, cutting it out is making me less hungry. Go figure. I am beginning to prefer the taste of naturally sweet foods more...oranges, yogurt (unsweetened - unflavored), tomatoes and I physically don't long for it. Hooray!

What to eat then?

I recently joined a CSA, which will deliver fresh, locally grown fruits and veggies to me each week. This means that I don't even have to go to the store to have all the healthy I need! I highly suggest doing things like this for yourself...if it's easy, you'll stick to it.

I looked up the various foods we should be eating each day and here's my list:

• Food Amount Calories
• Hemp Seeds 3 TBSP 135
• Yogurt 3/4 c 110
• Flax Seeds 2 TBSP 74
• Cinnamon 1/2 tsp 0
• Almonds 23 163
• Blueberries 1/2 c 42.5
• Broccoli 1/2 c 15
• Oatmeal 1 1/2 c 360
• Tea 2-5 c 0
• Beans 3/4 c 495.75
• Garlic 1 clove 0
• Olive Oil 1 TBSP 119

They can be combined and enjoyed in various ways. What matters is trying to eat as close to this list each day as possible for great nutrition and a balanced, happy body. Each has a different reason, so if you cannot stomach one of them, look up why they're good for you and find a substitute. Obviously you will eat more than just this...this is only about 1500 calories (and a person NOT trying to lose weight needs more than that).

*I want to take a moment to point out I am NOT a doctor/researcher/specialist and this is strictly what I was told by a friend whom I trust to have done the research. I encourage you to do the same if you're at all concerned that I'm wrong. Though I can't see a single negative come from eliminating this poison from your diet. To my knowledge no one ever died from NOT eating sugar.

Miscalculations

In the world of weight management, there is one factor that can silently sabotage your efforts...bad information. While much of the world is doing a great job of listing their calorie counts on their menus and in nutritional data online, not every restaurant does this yet. When having to do it on your own, it is quite possible that you will miscalculate things you eat.

This week, I did that. And I gained weight because of it. Thanks to My Fitness Pal, I was able to look at which foods I KNEW I got right, which then allowed me to see what I must have counted wrong. This did several things for me:

• It allows me to never eat those foods again, since I clearly can't properly account for them
• It allows me to NOT beat myself up for the weight gain
• and most importantly, it allows me to NOT let this to be a setback 

When you're trying to be healthy and lose weight (or gain it), as with everything in life, there is going to be a learning curve. Some days, weeks, months everything will go the way you think it will. And some won't. That's normal. When you don't know why it happened, it's easy to tell yourself that you failed, that your body is against you, that you might as well just give up because you clearly can't do this.

But when you know why, when you have the right tools and the means of changing your thought life to support you instead of sabotage you, miscalculations can be seen for what they are. Miscalculations. Not an attack, not a failure, not a character flaw. Just a simple, human, miscalculation.

So as I start my Friday, instead of feeling weaker, I actually feel stronger. I know how to do better next week, I know what to avoid and what doesn't support my efforts. I feel empowered.

***Sidenote: You'll notice in my post on what I eat, instead of deleting the things that contributed to this gain, I lined them out so that you too can avoid them :)

Bullies

While walking on the treadmill yesterday, I picked up and read Glamour Magazine. They've always been my favorite and the article I read just reinforced why. They covered the story of a newswoman who last year was bullied by a viewer. He emailed her this:

Hi Jennifer, It's unusual that I see your morning show, but I did so for a very short time today. I was surprised indeed to witness that your physical condition hasn't improved for many years. Surely you don't consider yourself a suitable example for this community's young people, girls in particular. Obesity is one of the worst choices a person can make and one of the most dangerous habits to maintain. I leave you this note hoping that you'll reconsider your responsibility as a local public personality to present and promote a healthy lifestyle.

As someone who has spent my entire adult life obese thanks to health issues, the word that struck me as the most ignorant was the word CHOICE. It made me really ponder the thought life of a person who would choose that word in this situation. Choice. I realized that there is an entire population of people who honestly believe that the way people get fat is by laying around the house eating McDonalds and Haagen Daas.

While I will give you that they do exist, I don't actually know ANYONE who got overweight through laziness and overeating. The laziness and overeating come because of the obesity, not the other way around. The obesity is usually a symptom of an illness...from asthma to pregnancy to hypothyroidism to joint/leg injuries to cancer to weak organs. The weight starts to come on quickly and before you know it you can't move and it basically doesn't matter how much or little you eat, it all just increases your waistline.

While it's easy to assume this man is an idiot or moron, I received an email from a friend of mine from church after my last post thanking me for teaching him so much. He is a learned, intelligent, articulate man in his 40s who is an athlete and he had no idea that there were steroids used medicinally or that they could alter one's body composition. It's unfortunate in today's society that the majority of people actually have no idea what obesity is, how it happens or what it means.

Everyone has their cross to bear; but if you would, take a moment to contemplate if whatever your issues are were out there for the world to see and judge. My asthma made me take meds that increased my weight significantly. I'm finally on my way back to health, but it took decades of trying and failing before I understood what my body needed and could mentally attack the pain in my joints and difficulty breathing in order to actually work out.

The only reason anyone knows I have an issue is because it caused an external symptom called obesity. Those suffering from bi-polar disorder, cancer, depression, IBS, etc generally do so in private. They would not be very happy if the whole world could tell just by looking at them that something was off. And then on top of it, to be blamed for it and told it is "one of the worst choices a person can make and one of the most dangerous habits to maintain."

The next time you see someone you consider obese, instead of thinking "wow, they should put down the donut and hit the gym," a more realistic thought would be, "whatever they're struggling to fight, I pray they get the help they need."

Happy hump day, folks :)

Perseverance

After last weeks minor setback, I proved to myself that I have changed. How? I did NOT emotionally react, feel defeated and throw in the towel. Instead, I had a protein day, got back to the gym and prayed that God would work His magic on my body to heal it and help it to rebound quickly from the illness and medication.

This week I am down not just the weight I gained that week, but an additional pound, bringing my total pounds lost to 25.6! I was prepared for it to come off slowly and was completely awe struck at the scale this morning. I knew I had followed the right eating plan and exercised; but with steroids, I was cautious to be optimistic. I'm overjoyed to see the quick rebound my body made and be able to see God's hand in helping me to get through that bump with a good attitude and get to see such awesome results.

Last weekend I realized I could no longer wear my normal work pants, as they're way too big, so I went shopping. I figured I'd be down a size and brought a bunch of pants to the dressing room. They were all too big. I'm down 2 sizes! It's such a great feeling to know I'm in control of my body and my mind even when things externally impact me.

Another funny thing...I took a picture with a friend and could actually see the difference in my face. It's weird when you see your own weight loss happening.

Excited for the weekend!!

Steroids and weight gain

Being an asthmatic and sick is no fun. Part of the joy of it is having to take steroids so you can breathe. No, they aren't anabolic steroids...they're corti-steroids which reduce inflammation and help my lungs relax. Yay for breathing, but along with it comes weight gain, grumpiness, insomnia and a general lack of energy. I only have 1 more day of them, thank goodness. They resulted in a gain of 4 pounds this week...ugh. They also make you hungrier, which doesn't help the matter.

When I was a kid, my well meaning grandmother got me a cat for Christmas. Soon after, my mom found me on the sofa after school barely breathing. When we got to the doctor, my asthma had returned with a vengeance and I was immediately put on a grip of steroids. Within the year I had gained 85 pounds. As a ballet and tap dancer, this was devastating. It changed my whole world and was sick to my stomach with an ulcer by the end of the year. I ended up taking myself off of all of them and just avoiding anything and everything that triggered my asthma.

It is that weight which I'm still trying to get rid of now at 34 years old. 25 years of weight from those steroids. I can forget sometimes why I got here, but moments like this...having to be back on them and seeing things change so quickly...reminds me of it all and the struggle I had at such a young age. It makes me grateful to have a strong prayer life now, a strong support system now, and the self-esteem to talk about it so that it no longer has a hold on my emotional health.

I know that next week I will be back on track and feeling great, this is just a blip, but it stinks just the same.

Munchies

As I approach my next hormonal shift, I notice two subtle things: I want to snack and I want salty or sweet things. The rest of the month I have been able to basically not pay a lot of attention to what I'm eating in a flavor or texture kind of way. I choose healthy foods that taste good and plan ahead well. Yesterday and today I am noticing a creeping need for munchies. Coworkers snacking is on my radar, I am thinking more about food than normal and I am starving.

While it's possible that it is tied to the minimal calories I had Monday, I think it is possible as well that my hormones are playing a role in this. I'm proud of myself in that I will still manage to stay within the 1500 calorie limit for the day, which is not normally how I would handle things when this shift comes through. It's a nice feeling to be in control even when my hormones and munchies are kicking.

Panera Bread: Testing my kryptonite

Everyone has their "thing" where food is concerned. For me, it's Panera Bread. Well...and brownies, but that's a whole other level of discussion. Panera is a place I used to go and order soup in a bread bowl, with bread on the side and a cookie. For anyone paying attention, that's about 1600 calories. For one meal.

When I began my healthy lifestyle, I decided Panera was a "no" food because of my history. Two months ago, I had my "last" Panera and said goodbye to my favorite spot.

With the success I've had lately in feeling so in control of my hunger, I decided it might be okay to pre-plan and try eating there in a healthy way. After inputting everything I like into their nutrition calculator (how awesome is THAT??) I saw the pattern of what IS and what IS NOT okay to have. Some things are fine on their own, but would not be enough, so it was good to play around with everything.

Ultimately I decided on a bowl of Black Bean soup (NOT in a bread bowl), a baguette on the side and two patties of the butter. The total calories: 440, with 18g of protein and only 5g of fat!

It's been about an hour now and I still feel great. I'm not craving anything, I'm satisfied and I'm STOKED that I can now safely order at my favorite place without feeling out of control or having to avoid it!!!

Lesson: When you're getting enough protein and vitamins, etc, cravings disappear so you're able to actually ENJOY something without it controlling you.

YAY!

Getting noticed

If you've never weighed a whole lot...or never lost it...you won't know the info below. Even if you have dropped a lot of weight, you may not have noticed what I'm about to tell you. Being a people-watcher extraordinaire, I have observed the following:

It's kind of weird that every stage of weight has it's own category of attention. 15 pounds ago I was in the "invisible" category; the place where no one really looks at you except random homeless people. This stage is actually a big reason people get to that high of a weight. Much research has gone into the psyche of being overweight and has found that most people are heavy to protect themselves in some way. It's usually sub-conscious, but it is rare to find someone like me...someone overweight who likes attention.

Now I'm in the "noticed in passing" stage where people notice me again and are beginning to have judgement in their looks. It's important to note that at no stage do I care about these varying degrees of reaction/attention; I just find people fascinating (hey, my degree is in Sociology). I love to make mental notes of different things as I people watch in a feeble attempt to understand how people think. It makes the time on the train feel shorter :)

As someone who has lost a significant amount of weight before in my life, I know I will soon drop into the "Noticed and possible competition" category. This category carries with it a bit harsher judgement. When you're being judged because someone thinks of you as "fat," they are judging your overall appearance. When you're being judged because you might be a potential competitor, the judgement becomes about everything...how your hair is done, what your lips looks like, whether your shoes match your purse, if your toe nails are painted, etc. Girls are ridiculous. Again, let me reiterate, I'm able to notice this because it amuses me. Woman have NO idea what men actually see in a girl, so we judge each other based on what we see. The funny thing is that when a girl judges another on all that, it has no basis in her competitive edge. I get hit on more in sweats and a hair tie than I ever do when I'm perfectly coiffed. And I get hit on by more married men than single ones. Figure that one out!

I mention all this merely because I can. Being someone who's self-esteem is firmly planted without regard to others, I thoroughly enjoy watching people's reactions to each other, including me. Being intuitive, I usually know what they're thinking, so I love to look them in the eye. It's fun to watch their reaction when they realize I know. I don't know how this communication exchange takes place, but some day we'll discover people are more telepathic than science currently attests to. Until then I will just continue to enjoy, observe and report back to you what I find.

Cheat days

Included in my "plan" are various kinds of cheat days. Once a week I can have 1800 calories and once a month I can have an unlimited day. This weekend I took both, haha. Having a visitor in town...my mom...means we are out and about more than usual. I enjoyed some Italian on Saturday and then Sunday had Chinese for lunch, Mexican for dinner AND some fro-yo with toppings for dessert. Hey, I'm a multi-cultural foodie.

What was awesome was that in neither case did I feel out of control, in neither case did I blow the rest of the day just because of those meals, and in neither case did I wake up feeling hungrier than normal. I decided when I made the "plan" that my big cheat day a month would be followed by a shake day to help re-regulate my blood sugar. I'm halfway through that today and feel great! I'm a little tired, and excited for my salad in an hour or so, but other than that I'm not weird out about it and I'm not trying to talk myself into eating instead.
Progress!

Scales and Alligators

An alligator will look at you, consider attacking and perhaps decide to let you off with a curious glance, making you certain of your safety; or so you thought. They can sneak up behind you, quick as lightening and attack, leaving you deeply damaged or dead.

Like alligators, scales should be treated with caution. A scale, if used properly, can be an instrument to tell you whether or not you're heading in the right direction. A scale might look harmless, but you can't "un-know" what it will tell you. You might step on it feeling great; you know you haven't overeaten, you have been exercising, you KNOW it will give you good news.

And then it doesn't.

And like a sneaky alligator, suddenly your thoughts begin to spiral, leaving you damaged or dead inside. You didn't see it coming and now the pretty day you woke up to feels like a hot subway station and you just need air.

WHY?

No matter what you tell yourself...muscle weighs more than fat, water weight could be to blame, weight fluctuates, etc...media and society base everything on the numbers on the scale. Instead of throwing on your favorite jeans and thinking, "Wow, they're loose!" we are trained to hop on a scale to determine what our mood should be for the day. Sounds like the voice from another post on here!

But how can you fix that???

Well there's different answers for everyone. For me, praying and determining my response to the number beforehand are a major factor. I can face it if I don't feel attached to the number. If I am in a place where I look at it as a tool to see what IS and IS NOT working, during a period of transition in my diet. Once transitioned, it's generally better for me to basically avoid them, as one bad "weigh-in" can make me doubt everything I've worked on since the last one. And those thoughts from earlier...muscle weighs more than fat, water weight could be to blame, weight fluctuates...are TRUE! But turning your thoughts from negative to positive take a LOT of practice, and sometimes I'm just not there.

If you're one of those weirdos who isn't affected by those numbers, awesome! Share your secrets!! If you're not, like most of us, stack it at the top of your closet and only break it out when you run into it. Spring cleaning! OH - time to weigh in! Your body and mind will thank you :)

The little voice in your head

I have never so easily been able to distinguish between my soul, my thoughts and the "other" voice in my head as clearly as I do now. My soul is curiously witnessing the exchange and basically not caring what happens ultimately as the body is a temporary residence anyway. But my thoughts are for the first time entirely separate from the voice in my head.

Before you ask, no I'm not schizophrenic, the voice isn't a person. It's the desire. I can hear it telling me just ONE cheat would be okay; just ONE bite; just ONE thing not on the list. Who wants rules anyway? Weren't they made to be broken? Do the doctors really MEAN no, or are they just being overly cautious? I've been good, don't I deserve this? Strict rules aren't healthy, you need this. YOU NEED THIS.

It gets louder.

And yet there above it all are my own thoughts. My very clear, very controlled brain saying NO. For the first time in my life, I think, I'm not trying to find a way to give in, I'm simply saying NO. It's liberating and terrifying and surreal.

The "other" wants me to fail. It wants and wants and wants and is never satiated. It is unwelcome in my life and yet sitting inside my own mind, harassing me to the point that I now need surgery. My epiphany is this:

I always thought I had no will power. That is entirely untrue, I have ridiculously strong will power. And my will WANTS to make the wrong choice. It wants me to fail. It isn't my will power being weak that is the problem, it's been my poor brain finding a way to say no to my will power. What a different world!

Ketosis saves the day

Somehow it did not occur to this two time Lindora patient that all the shakes were meant to do was get you in ketosis. Had I realized that, I could have avoided the almost 3 days of misery getting into it. Ketosis, if you don't know, is when your body uses up all the carbs you've eaten and stored and begins to burn your own fat for energy. Literally you are eating your own ass. Amazing. The up-side is that since you're getting surgery, you've got plenty where that came from! So how could your body be hungry?? Ever?

It isn't.

Thank you, God!

Here's my suggestion for those who aren't yet ON their 2 week diet.

Start 3 weeks before.

Don't panic, don't touch the shakes yet :)

Week 1 (3 weeks before surgery if you're required to do 2, 5 weeks before if required to do 4, etc.)

During this week, begin substituting protein for carbs. Eat as much as you want, as often as you want. Chicken, beef, fish, burgers (no bun), hot dogs (no bun), turkey, cottage cheese, greek yogurt, lunchmeats.  Also include all the non-starchy veggies you want...basically ALL of them except corn and beans.

NO fruits, breads, sweets, sugars, etc.

At night, a teaspoonful of REAL honey (in decaf tea is good too) will help you sleep (NOT corn syrup).

Drink literally anything non-caloric you want...broth, coffee, tea, sugar free sodas, etc. You will notice that after a few days, you're not hungry at all. Eating begins to feel like a chore and you change from thinking, "When do I get to eat again?" to "When do I HAVE to eat again." You simply stop wanting to. You will feel hungry when your blood sugar drops, so always ALWAYS eat every 3 hours. This is true no matter who you are or how much you weight. 3 hours is the magic time. You should not wait to feel hungry.

As you get closer to the end of the week, you'll be in ketosis. You might taste it like I do...a weird, almost rotten taste comes out when you breathe. This is normal. Your body is eating itself, it's not going to smell good. If you don't get this, consider yourself lucky!

Two ways you will KNOW you are in ketosis:

• You aren't hungry unless it's been hours since you ate last (and it's a mild hunger)
• You have a ton of energy and your mood is elevated

Week 2-3 Follow doctors orders

This would have been SOOOOO helpful for me and would have saved me several days of being miserably hungry. Once you're in ketosis, the switch to shakes is simply about taste and texture. GNC protein drinks are super cheap and taste great. The only down side is that they are super sweet, so you'll definitely want broth laying around so that you can drink that first in order to balance the sweetness. 

As always, please leave a comment if you'd like or ask a question if this isn't clear :)

Day 2 of shakes

It's amazing when you're hungry all the weird food memories you have. Last night I dreamt about eating strawberries. Today I am remembering two things vividly: 1 is the sandwich I ate after a 3 day fast I did years ago for a medical procedure. 2nd is food I had with my best friend years ago at a brewery in Long Beach, CA. NO idea why these two things are coming up for me, but here we are.

Last night I had beef broth with peas and carrots in it. I know, sounds odd, but I needed the sodium. Having all the sweet shakes is getting to me, so that helped. I also had some carrots with salsa and that helped a ton. THEN I had my final shake for the night, which allowed me to sleep nicely.

So far today I have no headache and haven't taken anything to prevent one.

I am GRUMPY. I noticed myself being short with members of my team, and could recognize my hunger behind it all. It's a bumpy road so far, but I know day 2 is supposed to be the worst. Ticking along...

I'm hungry...and it's only day 1

The shakes taste good, so I'm relieved about that, but not having any carbs or fat is killing me. It's only been a day, how am I going to get through 14 of them?? Once I've had surgery I would imagine my hunger is less...plus by then I'll have eaten nothing substantial in weeks. But ugh. I'm drinking water and decaf coffee and sugar free beverages a ton. I plan to get broth tonight so that I don't totally lose my mind; but this is NOT fun.

Many people have asked me why I don't "just diet and exercise"? I find this question so interesting. If it were that easy, I wouldn't be fat. I'm just saying. I did start to think, though, "Hey, why not try it again. I could do the shake days and then just eat slowly without needing surgery."

I'm only on day 1 and I would have cheated by now, a few times, if I were just doing this to lose weight. Knowing the surgery will be safer if I comply with this makes it easier mentally. Physically, though, I'm over it. I've been trying to explain to friends why I need this. It has never been so clear to me until right now. When there is a pending life or death consequence for my actions, I take it seriously. When the consequence is a maybe and is way off (ie: diabetes "someday") it isn't enough of a reason for me to stick to it.

So here I sit, drinking a decaf coffee, water and sparkling ice at the same time hoping the amount of liquid in my stomach will make the hunger stop. another hour until I can have another shake. The thought of MORE sweet isn't making it any better either. I need broth.

If you've been through this...how many days do you fantasize about "real" food?

Shake Day 1

It's only 10:45 and already I took a pain pill for the carb headache I was getting. Not good. I know it wasn't caffeine as I had my coffee. I don't mind the shakes, in fact they are tasty; but going down to less than 900 calories a day with almost zero carbs isn't going to be easy.

I feel for my coworkers!